


Forbidden love

by Querion



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F, Secret lesbian relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-10-20
Packaged: 2018-12-25 16:47:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12040077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Querion/pseuds/Querion
Summary: 39 year old Kathryn Janeway is a matron in an 18th Century Victorian hospital. She meets Annika Hansen, a brilliant but stubborn 24 year old newly qualified nurse. Their opinions often differ, leading to clashes and heated arguments but they always find a compromise and learn from each other.





	1. Chapter 1

A sole candle sat on a small desk in a corner of the room. Its yellow glow lit the room casting long shadows around. Kathryn Janeway sat at her desk in the nurses` home. She could not sleep...again. She stretched her hands high over her head. Pop!! The joints in her arms and lower spine realigned themselves. `That`s better!` The petite auburn haired woman said. She sighed and looked to the left side of the desk where a mug of coffee sat. She picked it up and brought it to her lips to taste it. Bleurgh! She lamented. The coffee was stone cold and undrinkable. Janeway sighed and put the mug back down. 

 

Sister Janeway, as she was known, was famous for hardworking, doing double and sometimes triple shifts. She usually got so absorbed in her work that she would forget to eat or drink. She has also been known to forfeit sleep for the love of her job. Her ward was clean, all equipment was stored in an orderly fashion and labelled. Her nurses were treated fairly. Record keeping of patients were updated on every shift where she would personally check to ensure authenticity of the records.

 

Ever since her father, Edward Janeway died in a ship`s accident ten years previously, Kathryn vowed to be the best nurse she could be one day. She had worked part time next door, mending fences and doing odd jobs around for the neighbours. At the end of the week they would pay her some money which she kept under her bed in a small leather purse given to her by her father. He told her that he got it from a place called Tau Ceti Prime. It was a far away land where they specialised in producing the best leather and leather goods possibly in the whole world. Kathryn would do her chores in the evening, before she went to bed, then studied for a couple of hours. She had to stay at home with her ageing, ailing mother to look after her. Her younger sibling, Phoebe, was married to a court clerk called Timothy Hill. They had two children.

 

Kathryn was different. She felt different. Her younger sister once told her that Kathryn did not like men and thought she was sexually attracted to women. Kathryn was outraged. She challenged her sister to prove this since she has never seen her have sex with a woman. Phoebe had a crooked smile on her face and told her older sibling that she did not have to `see Kathryn have sex with a woman` to prove her point. Phoebe calmly told her older sister that she had been studying her, the way she looked at other girls and young women with longing, was proof enough. Even Gretchen their mother told Phoebe that Kathryn will never marry a man and that that did not matter to her. She made Phoebe promise to look after her older sister, to love her regardless of her being `different.` Phoebe had solemnly agreed and told Janeway. Kathryn sighed and thanked her sister for understanding her. Phoebe smiled and said that it would be their family secret.

 

When Gretchen had taken ill, she lost the use of her hands and legs, and became aphasic, it fell on Kathryn`s shoulders to take care of her ailing mother. She would give her a bath, feed her, tidy the house then ran errands. In the evenings, she would get her mother ready for bed. Once in bed, Kathryn would do some chores and read books she got from Lewis Zimmerman, the library keeper. Currently she was reading a book of Human Anatomy and Physiology For Beginners. She planned on reading more physiology books if she could borrow them from Lewis` library. Lewis Zimmerman was very fond of her. She has shown above average knowledge in Mathematics, Human Anatomy and Physiology, Chemistry, Physics and Engineering. He believed that if Kathryn were a man he would have gone far in his studies and in life. However, women were regarded differently in these parts, possibly everywhere. Many men and most women believed that women should stay at home bearing and raising children. Most of the 39 year old Kathryn Janeway`s peers and friends were married and had three or four children. Janeway dreamed of a professional life. Nursing was the only way to get started in the professional world for women. Nursing and Teaching. She was planning to go to England one day where there were good nursing schools and train there. For now she could only wait, study more, raise enough money for a ship`s fare. Gretchen Janeway died a few months later and Kathryn felt lost and devastated. Her mother was everything to her. Janeway had confided her secret to her mother, that she dreamed of loving a woman one day. Gretchen promised her that she did not care whether Kathryn was `different.` All she knew was that Kathryn and Phoebe were her daughters and she loved them both very much. Gretchen was strong and determined in whatever she set her mind to do. Very much like herself. Kathryn vowed to her mother once that she will be the best person she can be. Now that her mother was gone, she had a chance to prove what she could do.


	2. An encounter like no other

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Annika was naturally hungry for knowledge. She had been one of those annoying kids who always asked the question "why" endlessly. Her wealthy parents heard of the standards of nurse training in England. They wanted the best for their only daughter. So Annika was bundled up and sent off to England on the Raven, their personal ship where she meets the auburn haired ward sister. Annika is immediately captivated by the blue grey eyes.

Annika Hansen had just completed her nurse training and graduated. She sat on the bed in the tiny room of the Nurses` Home. The room was small and scantily furnished compared to her own room back home in Sweden. Her parents Magnus and Erin Hansen were apiologists. They studied bee populations, their hierarchy, activities. They traveled all over the world collecting bee samples, recreating conditions necessary for honey production and keeping field notes on their findings. However, their approach to life and family was quite unconventional, according to their families and friends. Annika`s arrogance was well known in the area she lived. Family and neighbours forgave the girl, blaming her parents instead of their poor parenting methods. The Hansens were always absorbed in their work with barely enough time for their daughter. Erin was blamed the most because she was a woman who should be staying at home to look after her daughter and not pursue a useless career. Erin was accused of not grooming her daughter in preparation of marriage, now that she was 20 yeas old. Erin snapped at her parents claiming that Annika knew all there was to know about marriage. When the time came, the girl will make a perfect wife for her husband to be. Annika overheard the heated conversation between her maternal grandparents and her mother. She knew that she was not the least interested in Ragnar, the boy who lived down the street. He was also 20 years old. They had been childhood friends used played together when they were younger but when Annika turned 18, she decided to put a distance between them once and for all. The youngsters went out fishing together one day. They sat on a rock`s edge, next to each other with their legs dangling above the water below them. The river flowed at a slower pace this time of year. Ragnar leaned towards his friend and attempted to kiss her. Annika pretended to not notice the act. She continued to talk to him about how they could improve their fishing method because they had not caught anything yet. The boy grabbed her shoulders and forced Annika to turn towards him. He then forced himself on the teenager. With lightning reflex, the girl reversed their positions. She was now lying on top of the boy. With eyes flashing deep blue with anger and outrage, Annika warned the boy to never, ever try that game on her again. Then she pushed him with all her might where he fell into the river with a splash. Annika ran all the way home. 

 

That night she knew that she was never interested in boys. The near kiss with Ragnar disgusted her. `Perhaps she just did not like this particular boy?` She rationalized. Why had she never had a boyfriend? Why had she never kissed a boy before? Why was she not concerned in the least that she had never kissed a boy before? All her friends have been kissed by boys at festivals and at night. All Annika daydreamed about was how her best friend, Maja swayed her hips, what was the colour of her nipples and what would it be like to kiss her. At night she would fantasize being intimate with Maja while touching herself. This brought her sexual relief but only for a short while. When Annika told her friend about the river incident, Maja was outraged at her best friend. She told Annika to let Ragnar kiss her next time he tried again. Annika was not surprised by this reaction. She then asked Maja if she wanted her to demonstrate how the incident went. Maja laughed but agreed. So one evening, while her parents were out, Annika invited her best friend to her bedroom. The teenagers sat at the edge of the bed with their legs dangling over the floor. Annika, in good faith of recreating the river scenario, set to work. She forcefully grabbed her best friend`s shoulders and turned her so that they were facing each other. She then slowly and deliberately moved her head closer until their faces were only centimetres apart. When Maja did not back away, Annika took this as a positive sign. She moved once more and when they were close enough to take in each others` breath Annika gently moved her hands to the back of her best friend`s head. Maja closed her eyes while Annika kissed her briefly on the lips. Maja did not back away so Annika teased her friend`s lower lip and nibbled it. Maja opened her mouth where Annika kissed her deeply and just as quickly backed away.

 

Maja had to agree that the kiss was sweet. Annika had a goofy smile pasted on her face. Months later when Annika went to say good bye to her friend, they kissed again and Annika promised to write her a letter once she was settled in London. Three years had passed before Annika Hansen remembered to write to her friend back home. Her nurse training was quite demanding. Her classes were long and practical sessions were equally long and demanding. Often they were included in the staffing numbers. She had very little free time for leisure but like everything else she did, Annika excelled.

 

Her first day on the medical ward, Annika found herself on Sister Kathryn Janeway`s ward. During the morning handover, Annika listened to the auburn haired ward sister with blue grey eyes. Her expressive face, the husky voice, were enough to captivate the newly qualified nurse. Kathryn Janeway had called her to her office, in a corner of the ward. She allocated her to ten of the most ill patients. Annika smiled to herself. She loved a good challenge, or any challenge for that matter. Above all she liked a challenge especially if it came from the auburn haired ward sister.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos please. Thank you.


	3. A day in the life of a newly qualified nurse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Annika starts work. Ideally she was supposed to be supervised, work with another nurse for a while, but on this day, like most days, they were short staffed. She quickly realises that `get on with it` will be a phrase she will use often in her line of work.

As Sister Janeway listened to the report from the night staff, Annika discreetly checked her out. The auburn hair was hard to miss. It came down to the nape of her neck, gently curving at the edges. It shone in the single ray of sunshine which poured in from the large window, giving it a golden-auburn look. Nobody has ever described anyone`s hair like this but it did not matter. It reminded Annika of the honey from her parents` labs back home where they studied bees. One word came to her mind. `Perfection.` She snapped out of her musings when she heard her name being called.

"Miss Annika Hansen? Welcome to St Thomas Hospital. This is the medical ward and I am Kathryn Janeway, the ward manager. This is Patricia Burns, you will work with her today. I will show you around and if there is anything you need to know, just ask.

"Thank you, Sister." Annika said politely. 

 

Annika went to the bedside of a male patient on bed 1. She introduced herself to him and moved on to the next until she reached the last. This way she was trying to get to know the patients herself. She did not exactly rely on the night report she received earlier. She knew reports and verbal handovers were extremely important but personally knowing the patients helped put a name to a face. She noted that her colleague on the other side of the bay had already done half the work for the day. She seemed to rush through everything. She was experienced after all. Annika sighed. Sister Janeway came after a few minutes and went about showing her new staff around the ward. Annika liked the orderly fashion the sister kept things. Linens, gowns, pyjamas, blankets and pillow cases. She cringed when Janeway announced that she was going to show her the sluice room next. She had a pleasant surprise, however, because when they got there, the room was clean. There were wooden shelves where urinals and bed pans were kept in a neat fashion. Cleaning equipment such as rags and pails were in another corner also neatly organised. Annika smiled. She was going to like working here, she thought.

 

The new nurse went back to her patients. She started attending to the most ill of the patients and attended to the more abled ones last. Patricia poked her head to check on how her new colleague was doing. Annika smiled at her and said that she was managing, for now. Patricia went back to her assigned area. Annika made a list of what needed to be done, a sort of care plan for all her patients. She was going to recommend it to sister Janeway. When Janeway came to check on her it was well past two o`clock in the afternoon. 

 

Patricia came to Annika`s station again at ten past two to relieve her so she could go for a short break. She announced that Sister wanted Annika to have lunch with her. She has never had lunch with her nurses before, Patricia winked at Annika and went back to her duties. Annika was nervous and excited. She was not even sure how she was going to conduct herself in the presence of the famous ward sister. 

 

As they sat in Janeway`s office eating sandwiches and washing them down with coffee for Janeway and tea for Annika, Kathryn asked her new recruit what she liked to do in her free time. Annika gauged the question trying to find out what Kathryn really meant by that. She almost rolled her eyes when she saw how silly that sounded to her own ears. Obviously sister was just making conversation. At the back of her mind, however, Annika could not help noticing the wine red lips as they moved, the raised eye brow when Annika hesitated answering the question and there were the ears again. The delectable ears. Annika blushed and cleared her thought.

"I am sorry sister, could you repeat the question, please?" Janeway had a lop sided smile on her lips.

"I wanted to know what you liked to do in your free time?"

"Oh, i like to make things. I...take evening classes at Mr Thomas Paris and his wife B`Elanna. They teach how to make mechanical things work. His wife is very good at that sort of thing. Mr Paris tests them to make sure they work." 

"I....see. Maybe i will see you there sometime?" The sister asked.

"I beg your pardon, sister? What do you mean?"

"I mean that i, too, attend their classes. I agree B`Elanna is very good at making mechanical things. I also love building things. Well, it`s time to get back to work. We can talk about this later on."

"Thank you for the lunch, sister, i cannot thank you enough for your support. I feel very welcome here and you have been very patient with me when i was slow to catch up this morning."

"Slow to catch up? Annika, i have only known you for half a day and i already feel that you could run this ward all by yourself!"

"Thank you again, sister." Then she went back to the first bay to continue her work. Annika was happy that she and Kathryn shared so much in common. Now, if she could only get to know what Kathryn looked like under her apron.....

 

Annika`s musings were cut short when Patricia called out to her. She needed help with one of her patients.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kudos and comments. I love you all :)


	4. Birthday surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn gets a surprise birthday present...

Annika joined Janeway`s team in February, in the dead of winter. The wards were usually cold but the new nurse had devised a way to keep her bay warm and cosy. With B`Elanna`s help, the women came up with a device called a spark plug. They connected two to each end of a metal basin. The plugs` tips were joined by resistor wires. When a simple switch was turned on electrical charge would go from one end of the spark plug to another through the resistors. As it passes through them a red glow would be seen. This glow heated up the room for a short while. It was not much but it was functional and helped keep the patients comfortable. Annika had obtained permission from the ward sister and Janeway was pleased with her idea. The new nurse and sister Janeway devised little gadgets to make life easy on the ward. One such gadget was a big plastic water container which collected rain water. A long tube, which Janeway obtained from Tom and B`Elanna`s workshop, was poked through the container and a stopper at the other end. The stopper end was laid over a pail. Nurses would wash their hands after attending to one patient before moving to the next one. Suffice it to say that the patients in sister Janeway`s ward made quick recovery.

 

Three months later, the hospital inspection team made an unannounced visit to St Thomas Hospital. They found a lot of mistakes and unhygienic practices in many of the wards they inspected. When, they visited Janeway`s and Hansen`s ward, however, things were very different. All the patients were clean, they lay on clean linen, the ward itself was clean with no smells. Record keeping was exceptionally accurate. The inspector, Mr Robert Duncan, and his team was pleased with the state of the ward. He promised to write a positive report about it and made sure his ministry will do something to improve nurses` wages. Janeway knew that he was just a politician, his recommendations may not be received well by his peers and that his promises may not come true, she was still happy and encouraged by the positive feedback. The inspector did not know that the secret of the perfect ward was the fact that two women working there shared a passion for development and that they were secretly trying to impress each other. At the end of the inspection, Janeway took Duncan to her office where they had a long chat over coffee with biscuits. Here Duncan revealed that management was considering promoting her to being a matron for her exceptional service. Janeway was pleased and sad at the same time. She was happy because her hard work paid off. She was sad because this would mean that she will be away from Annika, whom she had grown very fond of. 

 

At lunch time Annika went to sister`s office carrying a tray of sandwiches, tea, coffee ad a small bowl of strawberries. Sister smiled when she saw the neatly arranged tray. Annika`s heart thumped in her chest when she saw the smile. She was also nervous for another reason. She knew that the day was 20th May, the sister`s birthday. So the previous night she organised her room and decorated it. She was planning on inviting Kathryn for dinner. She was unsure if Janeway would be agreeable to the idea. Should she invite her? 

 

She carefully placed the tray on the coffee table and sat on a chair opposite to the sister. She placed her hands neatly on her lap and waited. What was she waiting for? Annika almost rolled her eyes. She cleared her throat and said:

"Happy birthday, sister Janeway! Thank you for all you`ve done for this ward, for me. May i also take this chance to congratulate you on your promotion. May i ask you to join me for dinner in my room after work?" Annika waited with bated breath.

"Thank you, Annika. That was very thoughtful of you. I value your opinions and you have been a very productive member of the nursing team on this ward. The success of this ward is mainly because of your contributions. Thank you." Yes, I will be glad to join you for dinner tonight. Is there anything i should bring?" Janeway said in a husky voice. She had a crooked smile on her face which made Annika`s heart miss a beat. She knew that one`s heart missing a beat was a cardiac condition or problem but she would not mind dying if it was caused by this beautiful, mysterious woman in front of her. She again thought how Kathryn may look like under her apron... Her musings were interrupted by Janeway calling her name.

"Well, Ms Hansen, we haven`t got all day. Let us eat." They ate and went back to work.

 

Annika rushed up the stairs of the old building. She reached the second floor and fished a key from her small purse and placed it in the lock. She threw the door open and looked around the room. It was as tidy as she left it in the morning. All her preparations were made. The food was neatly placed on the small table with cutlery all neatly arranged. At ten past eight, Kathryn knocked on the door. Annika`s heart went to her throat when she opened the door and saw her boss standing before her. Kathryn wore a long skirt reaching her feet. A low cut button down blouse completed the look. Her auburn hair shone in the candle light which poured in through the half opened door giving it a golden look. It made Annika want to ruffle it as she lay above the woman. `Where had that thought come from?` Annika asked herself.

 

Kathryn walked up the stairs to the second floor. When she reached the end of the corridor she knocked at the door with a "22" labelled on it and waited. The door opened to reveal a smiling Annika. She wore a short sleeved red blouse and a long skirt blue skirt which covered her legs. Janeway did not know whether she should hug the woman or kiss her. She finally settled on offering the small woven basket she was carrying to her hostess while Annika moved so she could enter the room. Once in Kathryn smiled and scanned the room.

"Thank you for inviting me for dinner, and for knowing my birthday!" Janeway joked and laughed at her own joke. Annika joined in the laughter. The women posed in front of each other. An awkward silence shrouding them for a moment. Janeway recovered and shook her head. Why was she feeling awkward in the presence of this woman. `Perhaps because of all the dirty thoughts you have about her when you are alone in your bedchamber?` Kathryn`s little voice chastised her.

"Let us sit." Annika said as she pulled out a chair for her guest. "Thank you for the wine. I did not know you drank liquor." The younger woman said with a raised eye brow.

"Well, i thought this was a special occasion so we could have some. We are both off duty tomorrow after all." Kathryn`s cheeks went red. Annika looked at her mesmerised. `What was Kathryn trying to say?` She wondered.

"Yes, that is true. I do not have anything planned for tomorrow. I think i will stay in bed for longer than my usual waking time." Annika said and immediately regretted it as soon as the words left her mouth. She blushed and this time it was Kathryn`s turn to be mesmerised by the young woman. 

`What was Annika trying to say. Is this an invitation to stay?` Kathryn rolled her eyes when she realised that she was over thinking things.

 

Blue grey eyes pinned deep blue ones for a few moments then Janeway sat on the offered seat. Annika brought two glasses and filled them with the wine Kathryn brought. She offered one to the older woman and took the other for herself. They brought the glasses together and gently tapped them as Annika said "To friendship and Happy birthday."

"To friendship and thank you." Kathryn said. They both laughed and took a few sips from their glasses. There was a comfortable silence between them.

"Shall we eat?" Annika asked after a few moments. 

 

The younger woman reached the lid on a bowl of soup which was in front of Kathryn. She intended to take it off for her guest. Kathryn had a similar thought. They both reached their hands together and ended up holding each others` hands. 

"Sorry." Annika said. She cupped her guest`s hand longer than social etiquette would dictate. She looked at the small hand under hers and felt the warmth which permeated through her all the way to her already melting soul. She quickly removed her hand and smiled again.

"Sorry." The older woman said when she realised that Annika had the same thought of removing the lid off the soup bowl. When she felt the warm hand over hers she basked in the heat which melted her core. `Could she be?....` Kathryn wondered.

"Yes please, i am hungry." Said the older woman.

 

They ate and talked about their work, their shared love of technology and development. Janeway asked if Annika had a man waiting for her at home. She was overjoyed to learn that the younger woman had none.

"Do you have a husband at home or a man waiting to marry you?" Janeway wanted to know.

"No, i do not have a husband or a man waiting to marry me." Annika replied cryptically.

"Are you going to marry one of the young men here in London, then? I could help you choose a nice wedding dress. Just let me know when the time comes." Kathryn offered.

"No, i am not going to marry any of the young men here in London but you could help me choose a nice wedding dress. I shall let you know when the time comes!" Annika was at the verge of laughter when she saw her guest`s expression on her face. She had a cute furrow on her brow. Annika could not take it anymore. She laughed making the older woman laugh too.

"You are not the marrying type, then?" Kathryn started again.

"I am a marrying type, just not the ones around but one specific one. Sadly they are probably not available. What my heart wants, the world is not ready for it yet." Annika said thoughtfully.

"I....see. May i ask what your heart wants?" Kathryn felt like she was flirting with Annika but she did not really care. She had downed two glasses of wine and was feeling a bit brave to talk especially on this subject. She was also curious to know what the mysterious blue eyed beauty preferred as `marriage material.`

"Are you flirting with me, Kathryn?" Annika looked straight in her companion`s eyes and asked in a low alto voice. She had a seductive smile on her face.

"Yes! No! Uh, what was the question again, please?" Kathryn stammered as she was lost in the blue pools.

"Excellent! I was not sure you were my type but now i know!" The younger woman smiled triumphantly.

"Your type? What do you mean? Do you prefer females for company. Intimate company?"

"Yes." Was the simple reply.

"Well, that is a surprise. I like the female curves too." The older woman said as she finished drinking from her glass.

"Unfortunately people like us are considered outcasts. We could lose our jobs if anybody knew about us." Annika said thoughtfully.

 

Kathryn got up to leave but she was very unsteady on her feet. Annika offered Kathryn her bed so she could rest for a while and leave when she was ready. Kathryn agreed. So the young woman helped her friend into bed. She moved behind her and cuddled her from the back.

"Thank you for a lovely birthday present, dear Annika."

"You are welcome, my Kathryn." Janeway could hear laughter in her companion`s voice. 

 

Annika`s curves felt delicious as her chest rose and fell when she breathed. The soft breasts usually hidden under the apron she wore at work as part of her uniform, the warm breath at the nape of her neck, the alto voice, made Janeway feel dizzy with desire. It arose thick and deep within her and travelled to her spine where it took a turn to her nipples, causing them to pebble and way down below to the nether regions.

 

Annika felt her companion`s body radiating heat. It drew her impossibly closer to her. She reached her arms and circled Kathryn`s waist below her breasts. She pulled the older woman imposssibly closer to her. Tentatively, the younger woman reached up to lightly swipe her thumbs across the pebbled nipples. She felt Kathryn jump then arched her back. Annika`s breath hitched. She rose up to lean on her elbow. The neck before her was so inviting that she had to taste it. She reached down with her free arm and squeezed the small breast then pinched the nipple while licking the length of the neck exposed to her. She heard Kathryn moaning.

 

Kathryn wiggled around in an attempt to lie on her back on the small bed. With careful manouver the women managed to rearrange themselves so that they were facing each other. Kathryn undid her companion`s hair. As golden waves fell into her hands she reached forwards and kissed Annika. She felt the younger woman open her mouth. Janeway kissed her slowly and gently savouring the kiss as she moaned in contentment. A few kisses later they cuddled and fell asleep in each other`s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trying to get close to someone you like can be tricky especially when they have no clue what you`re on about, lol!!


	5. Cold feet, warm heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn has second thoughts about getting too close to Annika....

Annika lay in suspension, somewhere between consciousness and unconsciousness. Was she dreaming? She finally crawled out of the foggy, warm state she was in. When she tried to turn to her side there was something warm and soft against her side. Something very pleasant indeed. Then it hit her. 

"My goodness!" The younger woman gasped. "You are really here." She said reverently as she sat up leant on an elbow. She looked down at her slumbering companion. She let her eyes wander from head to toe. That phrase made her smile. It reminded her of the first year in her training where she had to do a `head to toe` examination on patients. She felt this was a handy physical examination. She was going to put it to good use now or soon. 

 

Auburn hair spread on the pillow, one arm neatly placed on her chest as it gently rose and fell. The elegant lips the colour of burnt roses were slightly parted. A pulse at her neck could be seen beating gently, Kathryn Janeway was beautiful in every way. Annika`s eyes wandered further down to the other woman`s chest. She was still wearing the clothes she wore at dinner time. The buttoned down blouse concealed the small, perfect breasts. The erect nipples made Annika`s eye brow raise in amusement. `What was she dreaming about?` She also knew that nipples do get erect when a woman slept so perhaps this was just a physiological response? She wondered. However, after the kisses and cuddles they shared before they both fell asleep, Annika was sure they both shared similar feelings towards one another. What now? Annika asked herself.

 

She attempted to move away from the woman but one of Kathryn`s leg was draped across hers. If she moved now the sleeping beauty may get up and Annika wanted to get them breakfast in bed. With careful maneuver, the younger woman succeeded in getting herself untangled from the pleasant warm body beside her. She quickly and efficiently got out of bed and went to the small kitchen to make a full English breakfast. Finally on a tray she had coffee and tea, toast and poached eggs, bacon, fried mushrooms and tomatoes. She brought the tray to the bedroom and carefully placed it on the dressing table.

 

Kathryn stirred and slowly opened her eyes. For a moment the blue grey eyes stared in confusion then her memory slowly cleared. She came to Annika`s room the previous evening after being invited for a birthday meal. They had a lovely meal together. They drank some wine then they...kissed?` Janeway panicked. She sat up and a wave of headache hit her followed by momentary dizziness. She lay back down. 

 

Annika came back to the bedroom to find the blue grey gaze pinned on her. Annika was wearing a short cotton night dress with the tiny buttons undone. Her nipples were erect possibly from the cool air in the room. She looked towards the bed and found the blue grey gaze pinned on her chest. It felt like a caress and the younger woman could feel her nipples tightening some more. A pleasant sensation filled her and she moved to the bed and sat at the edge.

"Breakfast is served." The nurse said to her boss.

"Thank you." Kathryn said and sat up. This time the dizziness and had cleared but she still had a bit of a headache lingering. She knew that after having the royalty class breakfast she will fell better. 

 

After breakfast the two women cleared up the dishes and did their ablutions. They were both due back on duty the following morning so Annika convinced her boss to stay a bit longer. Kathryn smiled.

"Are you flirting with me, Annika?"

"Did it work? You see Kathryn, i love you. From the very first day i saw you, three months ago, i knew you were special. Just tell me you feel the same way? Please?" The younger woman begged. She could feel her heart beating so hard in her chest as if trying to escape.

 

Kathryn looked at the woman sitting on a chair in front of her. She was a special woman, beautiful, attractive, gorgeous, intelligent, kind and organised. Very much like herself. This cannot be real. It has to be some sort of hallucination. On the other hand the past three months Kathryn had worked with the new recruit were very real. So that part cannot be a hallucination? Janeway rationalised. Her mind was troubled. 

"Why? Afraid of committing?" Her inner voice decided to resurface now. 

"You always had trouble dealing with matters of the heart! Wait, you have never dealt with matters of the heart before! I dare you to try now." It taunted her. Finally, Kathryn reached both hands and cupped Annika`s. "You are a lovely person, both inside and out. You are very professional and i am sure you will do great things one day. I love you for that." Janeway said.

 

Annika`s heart fell. Kathryn only cared for her as a loyal colleague, nothing more. She swallowed hard and tried to bundle up everything she experienced with this woman in the past 24 hours deep in one, tight parcel and shove it it in a tight corner of her mind. She did not have the courage to ask Janeway what she meant by that. So the younger woman took a deep breath, sighed and smiled at Kathryn. 

 

Janeway thanked her friend and went home. The next few weeks were a blurry. Kathryn tidied her old office in the medical ward and moved to the new office in the administrative block to resume her work as a matron. She was to be responsible for all the nine wards in the hospital. 

 

Annika helped her move her things to the new office and went back home. At night she tossed and turned in bed as her eidetic memory played back events from weeks before where she and Kathryn Janeway kissed, cuddled and shared a bed. Now Janeway was unattainable. She was a matron who was required to perform many official duties and attend many functions.

 

A new ward manager filled Kathryn`s old post, even though Kathryn recommended Annika`s name as a possible nurse to be in charge of the ward. The only thing was that Annika did not have enough experience to run the ward yet. Janeway thought it was a ridiculous thing to say about nurse Hansen. She worked with the frighteningly brilliant nurse and knew exactly why she recommended her to administration in the first place.

 

Months went by. Annika continued to work hard, often she worked double and triple shifts when they were short staffed. However, she did not have to do that anymore. In fact since matron Janeway moved in office things had improved. Staffing levels were much better compared to previous months. Annika`s reasons for working herself to death were very personal. She was trying to forget Janeway and to stop loving her. 

 

One night, in her desperation, Annika was lying on the bed. In the dark she decided to torture herself, punish herself for loving Kathryn, for pouring out her soul for the unattainable woman. She allowed her memory to play back the events from the night they spent together on Kathryn`s birthday, 20th May. She touched herself and imagined that it was Kathryn`s small, soft hands touching her. She moved one hand down to her breast and pinched her own painfully erect nipple which made her moan and whisper Kathryn`s name. Her other hand travelled down the length of her body to reach her engorged, drenched sex. She parted the lips aside and coaxed the clit out of its hood. It was erect and she could feel it poking her finger. The younger woman`s clit was too sensitive for direct stimulation, almost painful. She rubbed along the base gently at first then she speed up her motions. She almost climaxed but she slowed down again. She imagined Kathryn`s smoky tones whispering in her ear, kissable lips kissing and nibbling at the ear, telling her how much she loved her. The young woman pinched her nipple again then lightly rubbed her finger across the rock hard bud. With her other hand, she sped up her motions at the base of her clitoris. She felt warm evidence of her arousal gently gush out and on to her fingers. Her inner muscles clenched rhythmically as she climaxed. She whispered Kathrnyn`s name into the dark Then Annika fell asleep.

 

On the other side of the building, Janeway looked around her new flat on Addington street. It had two bedrooms and all the comforts of a home. She thought of how hard she worked to reach this far. Her parents would be pleased if they were around. She must write a letter to her sister in America, to tell her of how happy she was. Wait, was she really happy, 100% happy? If Kathryn were to be honest with herself, she was not really happy. A part of her longed to be appreciated. Her baser instincts were alive and kicking, thanks to her birthday present from one, stubborn nurse. She knew of personal needs, that you have to fulfil one before you moved to the next level. That was how the human body worked. She knew of how she was not innocent when it came to those times when she lay on her bed, at night, in the dark, when she pleasured herself. One beautiful blonde, blue eyed woman always succeeded in satisfying her baser needs even though only for a short while. Janeway sighed and went on unpacking her kitchen utensils.

 

Kathryn did not know why she was afraid to tell Annika how she exactly felt about the younger woman. She just knew that she was a private person, her sister told her that. Phoebe also said that Kathryn was probably a very intense person when it came to lovemaking. Janeway remembered looking at her sister incredulously and asked her how she could possibly know that sort of thing if she was not interested in women for intimacy. The younger Janeway told Kathryn that she was adventurous enough to try `these things` before she realised that she loved Timothy, her husband. Kathryn wondered if it were possible to enjoy the company of both men and women when it came to intimacies. Her younger sister seemed to have prove the point. 

 

Janeway planned to take Annika out for tea in the near future, when their day off coincided with each other. That chance, however, never arrived as Annika took on increasing workload, relieving other nurses instead, while she practically stayed on site. Janeway knew that she should do something before the younger woman worked herself to death. She convinced herself to `just take her friend out for tea.` That was therapeutic enough. Her inner voice sighed in a resigned tone.

`Kathryn Janeway, who are you trying to convince here? Me? Yourself? Just tell the woman exactly what you feel about her and get on with your lives. Oh, you have already got on with your lives! For goodness` sake, do something about your sex life!` 

 

Kathryn snorted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Entrusting one`s heart into another`s hand can be tricky. I seem to use the word `tricky` quite a bit, lol!!!!


	6. Coffee date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The women have issues they need to resolve before they move to the next level of their friendship.

On a cool September morning, Kathryn decided to take her friend out for coffee, for a chat, for anything. She just had to take her out somehow. Will Annika acquiesce with her plan?

 

Kathryn Janeway panicked. This was when she would usually change her mind, forget about the whole plan that she had carefully thought about for the past few weeks. As she sat in the small coffee house, waiting for her companion to arrive, she smiled to herself nervously as she practised what to say. Apologise? Accuse Annika for ignoring the notes she had been sending her to ask her out on a date these past few weeks? Be angry? No! She could not afford to be angry with her friend. She should at least find out why she ignored her messages first...then be angry! Her inner voice finished the thought for her and snorted.

 

Annika sat on the bed in her room surrounded by frocks of all sorts. She was trying to find out the best one for the date with Kathryn. A date? It`s just two friends meeting and drinking coffee. Goodness! She did not even like coffee! Her inner voice said. 

`Be quiet!` Annika silenced her inner voice. Finally she chose a low cut blouse with a flowing skirt which reached down to her ankles. Her hair was neatly done up in a bun. She completed her look with a blue necklace. She held her skirt up from her feet as she walked down the creaking stairs and out of the building on her way to the coffee house. 

 

Annika saw Kathryn sitting in the corner of the coffee house intently listening to a man talking about a new invention, the lens. It made small things look closer and bigger. This was important, he said, because there were small insects around which may cause diseases and nobody knew about them for lack of proper tools to see them. For a few moments Kathryn forgot why she was in the coffee house in the first place. Her natural curiosity kicked in and she wanted to hear everything about this `lens.` Then she looked towards the door to see who was there. Her curiosity gave way to admiration for the gorgeous woman in front of her. Kathryn had to be careful, of course, as to not show her `unnatural` affection for her friend. In fact, they both had to be very careful, especially here in public, in a coffee house.

 

Annika pulled out a chair and joined Kathryn at the table. Everybody in the coffee house knew the matron and the nurse who worked at St Thomas` hospital. So they did not give them much attention. Everybody was polite enough to give them some space. There were a few polite nods from the men and smiling, friendly greetings from the women. 

 

Kathryn wanted to explode with anger when Annika did not apologise for `missing` the notes she sent her. Annika, on the other hand, was furious with Kathryn for ignoring what they shared months ago in Annika`s room, on her bed. Annika poured her heart and soul, her everything to Kathryn while Kathryn trampled on it underfoot, and tossed it in the sluice room, as if nothing happened. How could she do such a thing and smile at her like that? The younger woman thought incredulously.

 

There was tension between the two women. Tension so thick it could be sliced with a hot knife. They drank their coffee for Kathryn and tea for Annika in silence.

"I do not enjoy this beverage knowing there is so much to be said...i need to apologise to you, Annika. I have so much to say but if you are agreeable, could we go to my house?" She waited with bated breath. This moment could either make or break whatever happens next. She could hardly hear anything around her over the noise her thundering heart made in her ears.

"Yes, Kathryn. I think that is a good idea." Then she got up to leave with Janeway following.

 

The women entered Kathryn`s small but elegant house. There was a large portrait of Queen Victoria above the fire place in the tiny living room. A vase of long stemmed flowers, which Annika identified as tulips, sat on a small brown, wooden bookshelf. Two couches placed opposite each other gave the room an air of homeliness. A small rug lay in the middle of the wooden floor. Annika scanned around the room and smiled appreciatively at the woman beside her.

 

Kathryn Janeway silently observed her companion as she scanned her home. It was almost as if she were waiting for an approval or appraisal of some sort. When Annika finally looked at her and smiled at her, the older woman released the breath she unknowingly held. She smiled back and showed her guest to one of the couches. Annika gracefully sat and looked at her hostess expectantly.

 

Janeway brought a tray of tea with biscuits which they both drank in silence. Finally Kathryn put her cup on the tray and cleared her throat.

"Annika, i am sorry for ignoring you. I was so very afraid of trusting you with my heart. You see, i love you so much but for some reason i was not sure about you. I do feel the same. There is a connection which goes deep within my soul. I was foolish to just let you go for all these months, without telling you what lay in my heart. Now i am telling you what i feel about you. Give me a chance to prove that to you. Tell me to stand on the roof and declare my undying love for you, i will do it." Kathryn said sincerely, even the last part of her monologue seemed sincere to Annika.

"Oh, Kathryn, i would never ask you to stand on the roof to declare your undying love for me. They would kill you and i do not want you dead!" Annika smiled gently. "I do however, want to know if you really mean what you said by stating that you have a connection which goes deep in your soul because i feel it too. I want to take things further with you, to share your joys, sorrows, burdens. I want us to have a shared life. If you will have me?" It was Annika`s turn to wait anxiously for a reply. Finally she heard her companion sigh.

 

The older woman reached her hand and pulled her companion close to her, so close that they could share each others` breath.

"Annika, my Annika. I love you so much. Now give me a kiss. A kiss which will inflame me and make me want more!"

"Gladly!" Then the young woman did just that.


	7. Consummation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn and Annika sort things out.

It was quiet in the cosy living room. The only sounds came from rustling of clothes as the two women rearranged themselves on the small couch. Annika sat up and pushed her companion so that her back was leaning against its arm rest. She looked down at the now reclining woman and smiled at her. She saw the elegant neck with a pulse throbbing as if inviting her to kiss and lick her there. The younger woman followed her instinct. She lowered herself towards Kathryn and licked the side of her neck. She started to kiss the warm, tender skin. The grey long sleeved blouse with lots of tiny buttons was impeding her path so Annika efficiently held both sides of the blouse and pulled it, with all her might in opposite directions, sending the tiny buttons flying across the room. She heard a gasp from her companion. The sight that was now before her was one which would be inscribed in her memory for a long time. Kathryn Janeway, with her head thrown back, eyes closed, auburn hair splayed all over the arm rest, kissable lips the colour of burnt roses slightly parted as she panted with arousal. The torn blouse revealed two perfect breasts with rosy tips almost similar to the colour of her lips, Annika mused then smiled. 

"Kathryn, look at me." Annika commanded. Janeway opened her eyes. Blue grey gaze pinning on her companion.

"Is this what you really want?" Annika wanted to know. The older woman nodded in affirmation.

"There`s no going back when we do this. You cannot reverse the situation. If you change your mind and decide that you do not love me anymore, it is going to break my heart for the rest of my life...but i will continue to love you."

 

Kathryn Janeway felt herself being pushed back towards the arm`s rest. She looked up to see the azure eyes pinned on her with an expression she has never seen on Annika`s face before, one she recognised as desire, hunger and lust. That inflammed the older woman. She felt a tingling sensation deep in her spine which spread all over her body to settle down south in her sex. Kathryn has had this feeling so many times before, in her room, alone at night, but being here with Annika made the feeling increase ten fold. When the younger woman licked her neck and kissed her, and her blouse torn apart, it made her gasp with intense sensation of wanting to be possessed, touched, fondled, played with this special woman. 

 

Janeway felt her engorged sex twitching impatiently. When a hot, wet mouth clamped on her left breast and lightly suck on the rock hard nipple, Kathryn arched her back towards the mouth effectively pushing the nipple in Annika`s mouth. Her legs parted, out of their own volition, to fall on either side of Annika`s thigh. She felt Annika`s leg push further into her sex, forcing her to move her hips up and down the leg. The evidence of her arousal coated the leg generously as the older woman rode the thigh enthusiastically. She moaned incessantly as she felt her clitoris glide over the smooth leg of her lover sending bolts of electrical sensations all over her body.

 

The sucking which alternated from the left nipple to the right, the squeezing sensations she felt when her rock, hard nipples were fondled and the deep kissing as the younger woman kissed her hotly on the mouth where she felt their tongues perform an erotic dance. She felt her inner muscles tickle as if electrified. The sensations built up. It forced her to speed up her hip movements.

"Annikaaa! Oh! Annikaa! Touch me...more...!" She felt her lover pinch both her nipples while she continued to kiss her hotly on the mouth. Kathryn heard her lover moan as the kiss deepened.

"Please Annika, i need more.." Kathryn begged. She did not know what she wanted but she knew that Annika had all she needed for her to reach the elusive peak.

"Gladly, my Kathryn." The young woman smiled. She reached her left hand down to the juncture between Kathryn`s legs where she could feel the soft downy hair. She let her fingers play in the hot, damp spot for a while then she raised an eye brow when she realised that her lover was not wearing under wear. She must have been anticipating this encounter, Annika smiled to herself.

"Mmmh! This is so good. So wet. Is it all for me?" 

"Yes, all for you, my darling Annika!"

 

Annika coaxed the little pleasure bundle of nerves out of its hood with her finger. It was not as small as she remembered her own to be. Maybe they are all of different sizes, she mused. She was brought back to the task at hand when she looked up and saw how desperate her lover looked. Annika reached down and parted her lover`s legs further apart. She draped each of Kathryn`s legs over her shoulders. Now Annika had a clear view of her lover`s sex. The younger woman reached down and fastened her lips to the pink clit before her and lightly sucked on it. She felt her head being pushed towards her lover`s sex. Annika increased her sucking motions. She groaned at the taste of the nectar and started to lick it up. She went back to her sucking of the clit while her fingers moved further down to tease the opening below. She gently entered her lover with three fingers and started a slow in and out motion. She sped this up when her lover`s hip motions became frantic.

 

Kathryn`s hips moved back and forth in short, jerky motions which accelerated until she finally climaxed.

"Aaaah! Aaaah! Aaaahhh!!" Kathryn`s legs fell limply aside and her hips ceased their motion. She felt her lover slow her movements and finally stopped and removed her fingers.

"Lie on top of me, Darling. I need to feel you, kiss you." Janeway husked. Annika did as asked and they kissed again hotly while Annika played with her lover`s breasts again. Kathryn tasted herself on Annika`s lips and she felt her arousal build up again. She could not believe it. She has never had such an experience before. She knew that she adored Annika but now she really loved her. 

 

Annika did not mind holding off her desire for a bit longer. Right now she has achieved the non-achievable. She got under Kathryn Janeway`s skirt and it was amazing, the younger woman mused.

 

Annika sat on the other side of the couch while waiting for her girlfriend. Kathryn disappeared into the bedroom and reemerged with a small wooden box in her hand. She sat beside Annika and opened the small box. In it were two necklaces. She removed one and placed it on her beloved`s neck then she fastened it at the back. Annika took the other one and did the same for her girlfriend.

"What does this mean?" Annika wanted to know.

"It means we are in a relationship...but we cannot tell anyone about it, no matter how we feel like telling other people." Kathryn said.

"Well, at least i finally got under your skirt!" Annika had a mischievous smile on her face while Kathryn smacked her playfully.


	8. Christmas on Addington Street

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The couple have their first christmas together.

Annika Hansen had learned way in advance, in October to be exact, that her lover will have a week off for christmas. Kathryn was the matron after all but she, a lowly nurse, will have to work through the festive period. Annika was determined to change that. She worked double and triple shifts to cover for colleagues then in turn she would get a few days off at christmas. Finally she managed to get seven days in a row. The young nurse planned to spend them with her lover who she had no chance to see since they made love a few weeks ago. That was unacceptable to her. The couple survived by writing secret little notes to each other reminding each other how they loved and enjoyed the day, how they were looking forward to spending christmas together.

 

Kathryn and Annika planned on attending Tom and B`Elanna Paris` christmas science exhibit, where all the latest gadgets were put to use for the public to see. Most people went to churches but Kathryn and Annika attended the science and engineering show. Tom and B`Elanna came up with very interesting machines. They explained how they worked and did a brief demonstration of each of them. It was like attending a very interesting lecture where one had absolutely no reason to doze off. The solar powered ice cream making machine captivated many people`s attention. The audience was treated to free ice cream. Kathryn and her girlfriend Annika sat next to each other, both wearing warm hats, gloves, thick fur coats and boots. Occasionally Annika would discreetly take off one glove and let her warm hand worm inside and up her friend`s blouse. The fingers would feel around until they reached a warm breast. They would travel up some more until they reached a hard nipple. Kathryn would jump up in `surprise` and look at her companion with a `frown` on her face. Annika would have an angelic smile and look forward to the lecturer. Janeway, now aroused, reached to Annika and whispered to her that they should leave. The young woman smiled triumphantly.

 

The fire was crackling in the fire place giving out a soft, yellow glow in the room. The couple had just finished dinner. Annika offered to clear the dishes while Janeway sat on the couch watching her lover do the chores. She had cooked the meal after all, now it was time for her to relax.

"Thank you for making dinner. The stuffed olives, cranberry, soya pieces, rice, onions, peppers, garlic, pastry, mushrooms and cabbage was exqiusite!" Annika said as she sat next to her girlfriend.

"Mmmh" Janeway said distractedly.

"This new non-animal protein diet is absolutely amazing, Kathryn. I wish we could eat like this everyday. The wine was nice too." 

"Yes?" Kathryn said, still distracted.

"Yes. Right now i am stuffed from all the second helping i had. I never have a second helping at meal times!" Annika continued to talk. She just noticed her companion look at her with lust and want.

"I, uh, thank you Annika. I never like eating animals protein but sometimes it is very hard to get alternatives so i go with the crowds. I have compiled a few recipes which you can use if you like."

"You never cease to amaze me, my Kathryn! Annika smiled gently at the older woman. She reached her hand out and stroked the strong chin before her. "I love you Kathryn Janeway."

"I love you too, Annika Hansen." She briefly kissed the young woman on the cheek.

"What do you want to do, now?" The nurse asked.

"I just want to be with you, feel your body beside me, underneath me, eat and drink from your secret garden, suck your nipples, make you moan, feel my lips between your warm, wet, pink folds, feel my tongue deep within your womanhood, feel your inner muscle tremble, drink up all your offerings and make you do that all over again, until morning." Janeway said in a matter of fact tone.

"Hmm, you are serious about this?" Annika looked at her girlfriend between her eyes searchingly. There was no sign of jesting, she was quite serious. 

"Now, my Annika, there is something i have to show you." Janeway got up from the seat to go in the bedroom. She came back out with a small wooden box. She sat beside her girlfriend and opened it. In it was a small purple book of all vegan recipes Janeway had compiled and handwritten by herself. The next item was a small yellow ring with a red heartshaped stone. "Happy christmas, my Darling. For the past few months i have been the happiest woman alive. I have a succesful career but my personal life was empty that is until you came along." Kathryn knelt before her girlfriend. "Will you marry me, Annika Hansen? I want to share my life with you, grow old with you, play with you, share my joys and sorrows with you. Will you have me?" Janeway waited with bated breath. She could hear the wind howling outside and the soft pattering sounds of snow as it hit the glass panes. She continued to wait.

 

Annika did not know what to say. She was pleasantly surprised. She never dreamed that Kathryn was the marrying type. Now she was before her, on her knee! On her knee, right, Annika thought. I must say something!

"Kathryn, please sit next to me. I am pleasantly surprised. I never thought that you would love me enough to marry me. I am so very happy. Thank you for the presents. I shall wear this ring as a reminder of my love for you. I want to marry you, play with you, share my joys, sorrows, my life with you. I want to grow old with you." She reached forward and kissed Kathryn soundly on the lips. When they came up for air Kathryn was not sure what planet she was on.

 

Kathryn took the ring, which Tom made for her. The Parises knew of the secret relationship Kathryn and Annika had. They were their friends. They assured Kathryn that they were happy to marry them whenever they were ready. B`Elanna knew of several other people around town also leading a similar life to Annika and Kathryn. She was eager to introduce her friends to them.

"We still have to talk about not revealing anything about our relationship, no matter how happy we are. We can only talk to the Parises and after christmas i will take you to meet some friends Susan Nicoletti and Kes. They are like us. I also hear that there are some men too but for now i just want to be with you, my Darling Annika."

 

They hugged and gently kissed. They both felt desire circling around them like a vulture. They continued to lazily kiss but Annika was getting eager and excited more by the second.

"Someone needs some attention, i see." Kathryn laughed. "Very well, let us go to the bedroom. I am not going to make love to my fiancee for the first time on a small couch. I`ll take you to bed."

"But i made love to you for the first time on a small couch!" Annika protested.

"Do not argue with me, Mrs Hansen-Janeway to be!"

"Yes, Kathryn. I like the names." The nurse said while being pulled to Kathryn`s bedroom.


	9. A weekend to remember

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn and Annika visit Tom and B`Elanna.

The weekend leading to the new year Annika and her fiancee were invited to Tom and B`Elanna`s house. Unbeknown to them, the Parises had also invited Susan Nicoletti and her girlfriend Kes. Suffice to say that on new year`s eve, the women had a pleasant surprise to meet their new friends Susan and Kes. Kes worked at a small dispensary where Tom Paris also worked part time as a medical assistant. Susan was also a maker like B`Elanna. She helped her design and test the inventions with Tom. 

 

On this particular evening, however, the friends agreed to not talk about work. So Kathryn felt it was appropriate to break the news of her engagement to Annika. Annika and Tom brought out a long table in the conservatory. Kathryn, Kes and B`Elanna brought out the different foods and snacks they prepared. Wine, brandy and beer was also available. Kathryn had downed two mugs of beer and was feeling a bit adventurous. She saw her girlfriend standing outside in the dark. She was looking at the clear sky admiring the twinkling stars. Her long fur coat made her look mysterious and Kathryn wanted to explore that mysterious beauty. Annika heard the sound of boots crunching snow. She ignored it and continued to look up at the stars.

"They are beautiful, aren`t they, my Love?" Janeway stood beside the tall woman and whispered in her ear with a low, husky tone. She felt her companion shiver.

"Y..yes, they are." Annika was caught off guard. She never expected her girlfriend to be standing this close to her in public. The warmth from the shorter woman`s body permeated through her as if she was not wearing a thick, warm coat. She liked it. "Are you trying to seduce me, Kathryn? We are in public! You cannot do that? No matter how much i want to make love to you until the new year!" Annika said with longing. She turned to look at the auburn haired woman between the eyes and embraced her. The young woman felt Kathryn embrace her tightly. It was a simple matter to just lower her head slightly and kiss the shorter woman. Kathryn reciprocated hungrily. The couple kept this up until they heard someone clearing their throat. They reluctantly stopped to see B`Elanna standing at the door and smiling at them. Kathryn smiled back while Annika was mortified for being caught in an intimate embrace with her fiancee. She and B`Elanna were not as close as Kathryn was to the other woman.

"I was just looking for my friends so we can have cake together." B`Elanna said.

"Cake?" Kathryn and Annika said together.

"Very good! You share the same thoughts and even speak at the same time!" B`Elanna observed. That made both Kathryn and Annika laugh. 

 

The trio walked into the warm house again where they all sat down on couches. Kes and Susan served coffee, tea and cake to everyone. They talked about new inventions, how they could all team up in the business and venture into this unknown voyage of invention. Kathryn laughed when she realized that they were going to talk about work after all but they all saw it as a good idea since they all shared the dream of a better world with machines to do some of the work for them. The group of six wrote down all the equipment they needed, which projects needed to be done first, and who was to handle which assignments. Tom suggested they call their business Voyager. When the others looked at him for explanation, he simply smiled and said that what they were planning to do was a voyage into the unknown, and they were the `voyagers.` Everybody laughed and thought it was an appropriate name. The friends talked about many things and B`Elanna looked at Kathryn trying to get her attention. When she finally got the redhead to look at her, she smiled at her. Janeway remembered that she was going to make an announcement. She had been holding off and told her friend, B`Elanna. The raven haired beauty promised to remind her to make the announcement. Janeway cleared her throat and looked around the room. 

"I, uh, have an announcement to make. Last week, Annika and i got engaged. We have not planned anything yet but we thought we should let you know. As your friends we need all the support we can get, particularly, we ask you not to reveal to anyone that we are involved in this manner or we could lose our jobs, or worse." Kathryn said seriously. The others congratulated them and drank more wine to the news. 

"Kathryn and Annika. We are here for you. Anything you need, just let us know." Annika saw Susan and Kes smile and hold each others` hands. It was then that the young woman finally knew that she was among real friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I try to imagine how people who did not live according to the norms of the Victorian time survived. It must have been hard to secretly love someone yet they could not do so publicly :(


	10. Realisation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kathryn and Annika acknowledge that they were destined to be together.

Kathryn and Seven returned home to Kathryn`s house after midnight. They celebrated the New Year with their friends and wanted some time alone. B`Elanna and the others did not mind them leaving `early.` The women walked silently together holding hands. They felt like they were surrounded by love and neither of them wanted to break the spell by talking. The only sounds heard were their breathing, barking of dogs in the distance and the crunching of snow beneath their booted feet. Finally they reached Addington Street and stood at Kathryn`s door. She took her glove off her hand and fished her key from the coat`s pocket. Kathryn stood aside to let her companion in first. She followed the other woman in and locked the door behind her. They stood in the hall way facing each other for a few moments as if they were having a staring contest. Finally Annika smiled and embraced her fiancee. They took their boots and coats off and left them in the hallway then Kathryn looked at the grandfather clock.

"Oh dear, Annika. Look at the time! I think we should go to bed."

"Yes, my Kathryn. I would love to go to bed with you." Annika said seductively. Kathryn looked at her for a few moments gauging whether the young woman was joking. She saw a serious face looking back at her.

"Well, what are we waiting for, then?" The older woman smiled.

 

They did their ablutions and went into Kathryn`s bedroom. Annika looked around the room. She immediately fell in love with it. Annika finally realised her destiny in the universe was to be with Kathryn Janeway. Even when the world around her was not ready to accept her relationship with this remarkable woman, she did not care. She was going to write a letter to her parents back in Sweden to let them know of her happiness. Unbeknown to Annika, Kathryn was having a similar thought. She realised that she was meant to be with Annika Hansen. Kathryn was going to write her sister back in America that she has finally found love in the form of a woman named Annika Hansen. Their love may be forbidden in the eyes of the society in which they lived but it was very real to the two women who now lay in bed. Warm, safe and secure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, folks, this is the end of the story. I hope you have enjoyed reading it. If so please drop me a line to let me know. Kudos would be nice too :)
> 
> Thank you.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are welcome. Please tell me what you think. Thank you.


End file.
